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let your yes be yes

and your no be no

In the reflection of #17 by Vera Pavlova


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#17

Why is the word yes so brief?

It should be

the longest,

the hardest,

so that you could not decide in an instant to say it,

so that upon reflection you could stop

in the middle of saying it.


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let your yes be yes

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In the reflection of #17 by Vera Pavlova


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Truly, I must share the precepts for this-I wrote this and had not planned to share, rather keep this to myself. Until I heard Anagha speak her name. My adult daughter; whom I wrote about, is named Annika (sounds like Anagha’s name or sounds like Hannukah). I see no coincidence but rather a validation of the point I wrote about. I am thankful for this. Truly truly grateful.

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Let your yes be yes and your no be no

Matthew writes in the Word.


But what of this yes and what of that no?

Do I not have the right

to change my heart and my mind as I grow?


“I take it back”,

I sometimes say,

For what I meant

was hidden away.

Locked up.

Like this imprisoning pandemic.

Trying to thrive

and praying just to survive.

Yet to actively live,

I regret I am hesitant.

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A yes and a no

intertwined and sorely mixed.


The list of things I wanted to do

The ways I wanted to show

and share my love for you.


“This wasn’t the plan”

I say to my God.


He smiles gently,

and reminds me


I Am,


but a child.


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I did say yes,

and I did say no

and those were the routes

I had planned to go.


I followed the Word,

or so I had thought,

to the best of my abilities,

I declared You, my Rock.


And now what have You taken,

or what is it I lost,

when my yes and my no

were cowardly crossed?


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My child refusing me-

Well, I guess I too,

have done that as His child.

My yes was not my yes.

I had rather decide my own strife.

My no was not my no.

Selfishly I wanted to live my own life.


Fears and tears

reveal my regrets.


Oh, how I miss you, my child.

You as well, are not done yet.


Forgive me Lord.

Help me to see

what it is You want me to be.

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Lord send Your love

to the hearts of my child


The connection we shared

as I carried you

who in my arms; I held,

and cherished your first smile.


Remind them Lord

as You have to me,

my love, like Yours,

is a bountiful and endless infinite…


Regardless of the “no” to needing me.


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Although you say “no” to me now,

in time, a yes may come around.


I too am here for you child,

and I love you forever.


To Annika,

my child,


From,

your Mom.


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